Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Slow and whiney

Oh right.  The blog.  I was going to update last week, but genuinely got busy.  But I also was probably annoyed that I maintained at WI even though I had a really unusually awesome WW-week, so I got all pissy and curled up into a ball and whined about it instead of blogging.

I lost 1 pound this week, which is really only 1 pound in the last 2 weeks, which is whiney and complainy and all that, but it’s tough to have 2 solid weeks of staying with my weekly points and *only* average half a pound.  But really, it’s a loss and I’m going in the right direction and in my enormous amount of time spent on WW, I can say I have absolute faith in the program in that I get what I put into it.  It doesn’t always show up on the scale that week, but it shows up somehow, sometime.  My clothes are looser, I feel great, I’m making healthy food choices, and I know I’m doing what I need to do.  So that’s enough for me for now.

You know what is friggen ridiculous?  I went back through my tracker and I have tracked every day since I went to Chicago May 15-18, AND I haven’t gone into the red at all since then.  And I’ve worked out and eaten pretty healthily and all that other good stuff.  I haven’t been perfect – I’ve dipped into my activity points a couple times (which I use after my weeklies and for me often means a gain/maintain) – but I’ve been pretty OK.  I’m not sure why I’ve been more motivated lately, but I’m down 6 pounds in that span.  It’s not crazy-fast, but it’s still coming off.

Sunday, June 17, 2012

This shit is happening

I got a new bathing suit recently since it had been a couple of years since my last one and I needed something new to wear in front of no one while laying out on my roof deck acquiring skin cancer.  Anyway, I mostly like it although like any bathing suit, it's quick to point out areas needing improvement.  Accordingly, I decided to be bold and post some bathing suit pics.  Except that it's a tankini and I'm wearing shorts because my thighs are not getting that kind of press, so it's really not exactly the bold move I'd like to pretend.  Even still, it's a nice picture to use in comparison to my older heavier pictures and to feel good about what I've done, but also a reminder that I still have more work to do.


I look awfully smiley for some reason.


Yes, I'm sucking in a smidge. Shut up.

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

107

Isn’t it funny how I start blogging on the reg once I have a good stretch on the scale? Be warned that this also means I’ll be disappearing shortly once things start to turn to shit again. I shouldn’t say that. It’s not shit. I’ve been very fortunate to have done WW for 175 weeks now (I just randomly decided to calculate that because I’m bored) without having any bad chunks of time, or gains of more than a few pounds. If plateauing, losing slowly, and yoyo-ing a couple pounds are as bad as it gets despite my somewhat recurrent laziness and screwing around with the plan, I have nothing to complain about.

I lost 2.8 this week, which is 5 pounds down in the past 4 weeks, and 107 down total. I realized I hit the 100 mark back in October so it’s been awhile since I got to see a colorful 5-pound star bouncing across my tracker, but it was greatly appreciated. I’m really surprised they haven’t done a reality show about me, because there’s very little as mind-blowingly exciting as watching someone lose weight at an average rate of 0.6 pounds a week for 3 years and 4+ months. Can you imagine if I knew that’s how long this crap would take when I signed up? I’d have just cut off a couple limbs instead and called it a day. But life would have gone on whether or not I was doing WW, so I might as well be losing – however slowly – than gaining over that stretch, as I was for the 7 preceding years.

Even though goal is still 15-30 pounds away (depending on the day), I’ve had my eye on the -114 mark forever since that’s my 18-year old weight and lowest of my adult life. SEVEN MORE POUNDS. I wasn’t totally satisfied then and I’m not totally satisfied now, but I’m at a point where I’m pretty cool with my body. I enjoy more of it than I abhor, and I’m not hateful towards even my least pleasant body parts. I’m on the edge of being content. After gaining as much weight as I did and spending the past three-plus years losing it and still feeling like I had so far to go, I finally feel like I’m close. Close isn’t there but it’s not an awful place to be, especially considering where I was a few years ago.

I’m not happy that I gained the weight, but it’s done wonders for my perspective. I’m exponentially happier at my current weight than I was the last time I was here, because I know how much worse it could be. And the fact that I’m the world’s slowest loser has helped me avoid taking any loss for granted. And I’m sure it has helped me keep going and keep off what I’ve lost. 107 pounds in 175 weeks has been a very good experience.

May 2008  /  June 2012


Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Summer is hard

I had a mostly good week with a sizeable blemish Saturday night.  I went out to a charity dinner/auction thing and they had 8 dessert stations set up at the after-party with a lot of deliciousness, which is really just unfair.  Food-wise I was on my shit but drink-wise was the usual issue.  Open bars are that way, I suppose.  I actually made a point to stick to drinking wine and light beer most of the night with a few shots when we went out to a couple bars later on.  My only drunk eating was some Goldfish when I got home so it could have been worse. 

It’s not that I have a problem with these occasional nights, but it is frustrating that I make healthy choices all week, prepare a week-full of nutritious lunches and dinners, and then go in the extreme opposite direction.  Based on my very general estimate, I still had about 5 APs left at the end of the week but it was still not a healthy endeavor.  And then Sunday my point usage wasn’t awful but Chinese food, a milkshake and some cream cheese straight from the container probably weren’t the most nutritious way to use them.  Or some might say. 

Anyway, I’m still working towards a good week ahead.  I lost 0.8 at WI yesterday from last Tuesday’s official WI.  It was still up from what I was when I cheat-peeked at Wednesday but I’m cool with it for sure, and it was a solid reminder that I need to stop weighing throughout the week.  My “tightest” pair of pants in my current size are getting loose so I know I’m creeping up on solidly fitting into the next size down.  I’m also happy to say that running has been making my ass look hotter, so at least that’s some incentive to keep doing it on occasion. 

This week is doable.  I’ve got a charity happy hour thing tomorrow night (the points really shouldn’t count when it’s for charity) but I think this weekend will be pretty low-key.  I had been planning on going to the shore Friday night since I didn’t make it last weekend but in addition to WW, my body just needs a chill and relaxing weekend.  So chill and relax, I shall.