Same Old Shit

I’m back into the back-and-forth again on the scale.  This seems like my personal theme for the summer, but as usual I will remind myself that if I end the summer lighter than I started it, it doesn’t really matter what transpired in between.  I lost 1.4 last week after gaining 1.8 the week before, then gained 1.2 this week.  It’s definitely a sign that I had a really spectacularly horrible WW week when I actually grinned at the “only” +1.2 on the scale this week.  I was nearing the 80-in-the-red marker so I just wanted to limit the damage.  I was out of town Saturday to Monday and ate every meal out, and made little effort to make good food choices.  Nevertheless, I’m only 1.6 above what I was a couple weeks ago so I’m not really in a bad spot considering my less than fabulous past few weeks.

I am trying to actually put together a solid week, or maybe even 2 weeks if I’m really feeling ambitious.  I’ve been pretty haphazard with my gym-going in the past month, so also trying to get that back on track.  I have actually managed to string together two straight decent days the past two days where I didn’t abuse my WPs and worked out both days, so hoping to keep that streak alive today.  No workout planned, but another non-shitty eating day would be nice.

I’m still hovering a couple pounds away from the -100 mark, but it’s funny how once you get so close and stick around there for a few weeks, the actual milestone sort of starts to lose its luster.  I feel like I’ve been thinking about it for so long now, and rounding up to that number in my head, that I don’t think I’ll be insanely excited to actually hit it.  But I still want to just get there and keep moving forward and there is definitely no lack of incentive on my part to keep losing.

Post-bday and a new Before/During shot

The birthday weekend was fantastic and I'm finally getting used to calling myself 28.  Eventually I finished the last morsel of birthday cake and had no choice but to get somewhat back in the WW game again.  For the first time in several months I didn't track last weekend, and didn't go back-track it afterward.  I feel kinda guilty about it, but I'd rather just move on than dwell over it at this point.  And trying to remember what and how much I imbibed on Friday night would be futile at best.  I had an expectedly overindulgent weekend and the scale is at least finally making sense again, with a 1.8 pound gain this past week.  Part of me was just delighted that the rest of the weird 4.6 pound loss from the previous weeks didn't come back on.

I've been a little sketchy with the gym lately and haven't gotten into my usual rhythm, but have been trying to crank out at least a few workouts here and there.  I went Sunday and Monday and then didn't go again until today, but a twinge of guilt made me stay for a second class.  Exercise for me seems to be something that relies heavily on momentum so I just want to make sure I keep going and hopefully get back to some kind of regularity again.  It's really just too bad that working out isn't nearly as enjoyable as, say, eating pizza or sleeping.  Because I never lose momentum with those choice activities.

I put together another before-during picture comparison, not because I'm really that much lighter than when I did the last one, but because I stumbled across some particularly horrifying "before" pics that I just had to utilize.  They were taken the weekend of my BFF's bridal shower which I might have mentioned before was right before I re-joined/committed to WW.  The pictures were (and still are) sort of eye-opening, because I still can't help but think that I never believed I was THAT big.  I knew I was a good 35 pounds heavier than I had previously ever been, but the pictures really hammered that shit home for me.  And can we also talk about the fact that I just looked like a hot mess in the before shot?  I had dyed my hair brown and the color was fading out, and it looked like I apparently couldn't be bothered to brush that rats nest.  But anyway.  The pic on the right was taken this past Friday during my bday celebration, 97.8 pounds lighter than in the first pic.

The sizing on the pics themselves isn't quite even so as to provide a perfect comparison, but you get the idea.

So 100 is right around the corner, but it could be another couple weeks before I actually hit it.  While I'm excited for it, I'm even more interested in getting to the -114 mark which puts me at my freshmen year of college weight, my lowest adult weight.  It's always in the back of my head, and I've been thinking about it a lot lately.  Who knows when I'll get there, but I'd just like to keep moving forward and stop dicking around with birthday cake.