The other day I was reading Us Weekly's "hot bodies" issue which they seem to push out about once every other month, more frequently in summer of course, where they focus on various celebs in slutty beach attire and include quotes from them with tips on how they look so bangin and skinny. I can never decide which is worse.. the ones that are like "I get exercise by chasing my kids around and I try to make small changes here and there!" or the ones that acknowledge reality and cop to their vegan, gluten-free, food-free diets followed by 4 hours of deep sea pilates. Like, the latter is really depressing because we all know (well, I know) that I'm way too lazy, unmotivated and undisciplined to do a fraction of what is required to look that good, but on the other hand when Chrissy Teigen is like, "I love dessert!!" I'm like bitch, you don't even know what dessert is, I'll take your 1/2 cup of frozen grapes and trade you a deep fried waffle sundae and then we'll talk.
Anyway, I'm not complaining.. those people put the work in for those bodies so if they are willing to forego pizza and happiness then they should get the results. On the other hand... actually I don't remember what the other hand was, I guess all that to say I'm lazy and not very good at not eating so I will never be skinny, the end.
So, I continue to truck along daydreaming about being svelter (really just another 12 pounds would be delightful) while hating the process to get there. This seems like somewhat of a first world problem. In an effort to preserve a morsel of perspective, I've been trying to think more about things I've begun to take for granted that I couldn't a few years back when I was at/near my heaviest. I was sitting in the waiting room at the dentist earlier today and the rows of seats with armrest dividers made me think back to doctor's appointments in 2008 when I'd survey the waiting room chairs and debate where to sit and wonder how tightly wedged my hips and ass would be. At the time, it had become one of those things (like flying, and sitting in beach chairs) that would always cause a moment of panic and made my life a bit more stressful. These are the things that you cannot really understand unless you've been substantially overweight.
Sorry, that shit got deep yeah? I figured I'd add a few thoughts that were a bit less useless and whiny since most of my posts here lately are somewhat useless and whiny. To provide some more use, I've been really digging some new recipes lately so here are some recommendations:
Gimme Some Oven White Enchilada Casserole
Walnut Grape & Blue Cheese Quinoa Salad
Emily Bites Chicken and Chorizo Salsa Skillet
Also, I made slow cooker sweet potato chili on Monday and have finally gotten down an ingredient combination for it that I love. I browned a pound of hot Italian turkey sausage links (out of the casings, broken up while cooking) with 1/2 an onion, diced, and threw that into the slow cooker with a can of Rotel, 2 diced sweet potatoes, an 8 oz can of tomato sauce, a can of drained and rinsed cannellini beans, 2/3 cup water, some cumin, chili powder, a bit of cayenne, and a pinch of brown sugar, and it really hit the spot.
Alright since I provided some good food, I'll end with a picture of me in a new maxi dress (under $25, Old Navy ballllller) showing off my arms and tan. I know, I know, sunscreen, etc. Sorry that I can't not make a stupid face when taking a mirror selfie but a) I was sending it to my sister in need of outfit advice and I wasn't going to stand there posing (oh wait, I am standing there posing) and b) it's my blog so I'll do whatever the fuck I want.
By way of a very quick surgery update.. everything is good, healing is good, wishing my arm scars would heal faster so I just ordered some silicon scar sheets and will update on how those pan out. Otherwise all good!